we really must stop running into each other like this...

Poor eating deciions seem to plague me at work. I arrive at work to find a bag of cookies on my desk (some sort of holiday gift), which I devoured. And then, my good friend brings me a hash brown from McDonald's. Who can resist a McDonald's hash brown? Mmm... (even if I just had one yesterday).
I have a lovely lunch of leftover from last night's dinner at Bonefish Grill and as I'm going to get my utensils, there is an entire spread of cakes, brownies and cookies on the table! Now, normally I can ignore some of these items especially since I already had a bit of a sugar fix this morning, but there was also a box of KRISPY KREME donuts on the table! So, I polished off half a crueller and took a chocolate iced and holiday sprinkled donut back to my desk with me.
I will be good and eat my lunch before I have the donut. I skipped my real breakfast this morning (instant oatmeal) so my body should probably have some non-junk food.

an expensive day off

So, my car died on me today. At an intersection about a mile away from my house. I had to call a tow truck to come get me and take me back home. This cost me $84, but boy was I relieved to be off the road and warm inside the house. I didn't have an economical way to work, so I stayed home. It actually wasn't a bad day to stay at home because furniture people were coming to look at the bed that they had delivered and I got to sort through/organize some things (even if that just means consolidating it all into one drawer instead of two... does anyone else have this problem?)

Anyway, so something had to be done about the car, right? After I got some good information about local mechanics, I had to have another tow truck come to take it over there. Another 80 some dollars.

The mechanic will charge $115 just to run the diagnostics and then who knows what I will have to pay for in repairs. Ugh...

I did manage to spend some happy money today though! Snapfish had a coupon for 100 free prints if you made a purchase of at least $5. I spent about $15 and saved $9 in prints. The bulk of it was Australia pics, not that I have even gotten around to scrapbooking that trip.

There seems to be a never-ending list of things to do at the house. Clean gutters change air filters, rake the leaves, remove the half-bath wallpaper, buy this, clean that. If this were a few years ago and I had to miss work, I would have been sleeping! Perhaps the amount of sleep you get determines your status as an adult. Being awake means that you have responsibilities that you feel obligated towards. Less hours of sleep = more adult-like. I mean, I at least know that babies sleep tons and old people typically get up super early, though I'm not sure if it's because of an early bed time and there is that whole theory that you are just reverting back to infancy in old age. Now kids in college - there is quite a range of sleep cycles. You have your kids that like to burn the midnight oil pulling all-nighters or the regimented ones that know they need their full 8 hours or the ones that come back from class and get right back into bed. And obviously parents sleep a LOT less since they have to take care of their children. There aren't many responsibilities greater than being a parent.

Gosh - I'm not sure how this post ended up on this topic. It's definitely time for bed.

basement brothel - part 4.5

On the night on Thursday, October 22nd, 2009, the last "guest" to leave Apt T3 left a little past midnight. Yep... what other activities do you imagine going on at that time of night?

basement brothel part 4 - final installment

As we're getting stuff moved out of the apartment, we're seeing a lot more "business." Today, we happened to get mail for T3, so J made several attempts to give them their mail. However, they never opened the door when he knocked. Not once! How shady is that? A man had just gone into their apartment a few minutes prior and now all of a sudden they can't open the door... Something fishy is definitely afoot. They even looked out the peephole! J also heard sounds of a belt buckle inside, as well as voices.

It is getting really irritating that there has never been any interaction with these "neighbors," besides the glimpses we've had of them as they trek behind the apartment to Starbucks (they hold Starbucks cups when they come back from their excursions - I believe this is where they solicit their clients).

I have a theory that they don't actually live there and that the place is just rented out for them to conduct their clandestine activities. Never have they checked the mail and never have they used the front entrance. They just always go out the back. I've never even seen them come out of their front door. The only people to come in and out of that place are men!

*sigh* So, these are the final hours of this investigation... I wonder if we'll uncover anything else. Also, is this something I should tell the new tenant about?

keys open doors, keys open doors...

A week ago was closing day on the house. Keys are in hand, stuff has gradually been moved over, the painters are there getting after the ugly blue trim, window salesmen have come and gone (decision still pending). All these developments have left me shell-shocked. I think it takes awhile to get used to changes that have such an impact on your life. I haven't lived in the same place for more than about 4-5 years, so it's incredible to think that I will be living in the new house for at least twice as long as I have lived anywhere else!

Tomorrow is the big moving day. It's going to be amazing to watch the house fill up stuff, but it will be even more amazing to watch it fill up with the people I love.

basement brothel part 3

When J went to take the trash out yesterday, he ran into an Indian guy who was coming into our hallway. He appeared skittish and acted like he was going to leave. When the guy saw that J was going out a different door, he continued to T3. As J was coming back from taking out the trash, the guy left looking all around like he was afraid of being seen. It doesn't seem like he made it into our neighbor's. I guess he got cold feet.

Today, there was a notice on their door. It was a "Summons for Unlawful Detainer." This was the information that I found. Pretty interesting, eh? Looks like our apartment community might be on to them as well...

basement brothel part 2

So, it's 9 pm on a Thursday night and someone just knocked on the door. A man.

J opened it and the guy said, "Sorry, I must have the wrong address."

Talk about awkward! What if I had opened the door? I guess I should have to see what he said! And I could then ask him what was going on over there. But would he even tell me?!

My suspicions must be true. I just need that confirmation. Well, looks like I have at least another month to figure it out.

are you my mother?

Today I tried on dresses with E, K and my mom. Despite numerous phone calls and text messages, I have not heard from my mom since the week I got back from Australia. Or at least that's how it seems. And I hadn't seen her since the end of July. It is now September. She doesn't live that far away, but we never see each other because she doesn't seem to know how to call me or answer her phone.

I just feel really frustrated with her at the moment. She's in the process of moving right now, so I guess I should cut her some slack. I will be going over there this Saturday to help her and to also get some of my things.

I just want her to be more involved with my life and it seems like she's slipping farther and farther away and now she'll actually be even farther away distance wise. I just don't know what my expectations are of her anymore. I feel like she doesn't really know me, but I still value her opinion more than most other people.

While I was in Australia, my cousin Christina told me all about my mom's life - stuff that was a mystery to me, stuff that my mom had been keeping from me even when I asked her bluntly about it. I hate that my mom doesn't feel the need to tell me things about her life. *sigh* Maybe I'll finally meet her "boyfriend" on Saturday, since he's probably helping her move. With my luck, I'll probably show up to an empty house.

third times the charm... hopefully

House-Hunting: Even before J got a job, we had been looking at potential homes. Of course E wanted us to stay in C'ville forever and ever, but we finally did venture beyond the 20121 zip code. Since moving to Tysons, we started to check out some other areas and once J got his job offer, we were ready to start looking more seriously. We've already put in two offers on places in Centreville. Neither worked out. The third offer we put in was for a place in Fairfax. It looks like third time will be the charm! The house is old, as in built in the days of lead-paint possibly. That will be checked out during the home inspection, among other things. Then there is also the appraisal process, so it will still be a few weeks before we know for sure whether we will be moving there or not. The place is about mid-way between J's job and my job and it has 3 bedrooms and 3 full baths and tons of space. The only thing it's really lacking is outdoor living space, but hopefully there is enough for J and his grill to be reunited.

two years...

My dad has mentioned to me a few times that my god-cousin, Allen, had a brain tumor. He would ask me if I had heard any word of whether Allen had passed away or not. Growing up, my mom, grandmother, brother and I would go to visit Allen's family in North Carolina a lot. I can remember spending short weekends there as well as entire summers.

Allen was some years older than me. He got married when I was in the 11th grade. That was the last time I saw him.

Today, I went over to my cousin Cathy's to pick up some pictures that my uncle had set aside for me. While I was over there, my uncle told me that Allen passed away two years ago. I didn't know how to respond, though I was already given some warning via my dad. I guess I knew it was a strong possibility. I just can't believe he died two years ago.

My mom has grown so distant from the people that she was once close to, which is probably why we didn't find out about Allen. My cousin, Christina, gave me some insight on that while I was in Australia. I guess it's a lot of cultural and "adult" stuff that I wouldn't understand or stuff that my mom doesn't think I would understand. Come to think of it, two years ago was also right around the time my step-dad passed away.

I guess sometimes we don't know how to reach out when our loved ones are what we need.

Allen's parents helped shape my childhood. I spent summers in their restaurant clearing tables, peeling potatoes, wrapping eggrolls, etc. They helped my family a lot through the whole messy divorce between my parents. I feel devastated that I was not there for them in their time of grief. I hate that we've lost touch with them, but I'm not sure how to get back in touch again.

basement brothel

The day I started moving in to my new apartment, I noticed something strange. The apartment across the hall housed at least 2-3 Asian women who seemed to receive a lot of male visitors. In fact, on that first day, in a half hour span, two different middle-aged men knocked on the door and were let in.

Before I left for Australia, I commented to J that I thought they were prostitutes. He knows I enjoy making outlandish observations, but while I was in Australia, he had plenty of time to make his own observations. The trend continued. There seemed to be a steady flow of male visitors who would leave typically within an hour.

Every time there is a noise in the hallway, we go bolting to the peephole to see who might be out there. It never fails. It's always a random man. There have even been a few repeat visitors. We take every opportunity to peak into their apartment via the sliding glass doors in the back. There is a partition up on one side and a sofa bed, I believe. The tv will often be on, but nobody is there watching. I never see them inside, so I can only deduce that they are in the bedroom!

I'm tempted to knock on the door one day and introduce myself. I'm afraid the new neighbor window will be closed soon. How am I supposed to gather more evidence to support my hypothesis?

dashed

I found out just now that I didn't get my supervisor's position. One of my old managers got the job. I'm just glad it was an old manager and not a co-worker. She's really good at what she does, so I'm sure I'll have plenty to learn from her. She won't start until the end of the month/beginning of next month probably, so all of fall hiring is still on my shoulders.

I guess this is for the best. I think getting away for a bit has refreshed me enough for me to stick with my job for awhile. Hopefully a raise is coming soon!

superman

Christina told me that whenever Audrey goes to the pool she recalls when I taught her how to do the "Superman." "Auntie HT taught me how to do this." It's just about the simplest thing you can do at the pool - push off the wall and stretch your arms out like you're flying a la the man with the "S" on his chest.

I was touched. Audrey was 4 and they still lived in Singapore. It was so long ago and I don't even really remember it, yet it has stayed with her. It's funny the things that stand out in our memories. I hope that moments from this past trip will stay with her as well. And I hope wonderful memories of me were created for little Marcus.

back to life, back to reality

It's a little before 7 am. I leave Melbourne to head home in a few short hours. It is so sad to leave because I've had such a wonderful time here. Spending time with Audrey and Marcus (my cousin's children) has been such a joy. My cousin Christina and her husband CK watched me and my brother grow up and I only wish that we lived closer and could do the same with their children. Maybe we can, in our own way - probably mostly via photos and skype.

Christina and CK have been so generous with everything. They opened up their home to us and made sure we saw sights and ate to our heart's content. Christina and I also had a lot of good conversations - I learned about family history, the trials she experienced in her life, and even details unbeknownst to me about my mom. She's the oldest granddaughter of my grandmother's grandchildren and I'm the youngest. There is a 15 year age difference, yet she is one of my closest cousins.

Audrey and Marcus are such great kids. Audrey is a brilliant girl on the cusp of adolescence. It's a trying time for all involved and I hope that I can provide some counsel for her. She is not only smart, but participates in tons of activities as well and she no doubt has a good head on her shoulders. Marcus is a ball of energy who is also loving and sweet. One night in the car he whispered to me, "You are my best friend. I love you." His little accent is adorable. Yesterday when we dropped him off at school, he had a bit of a tantrum and kept asking his mom for more hugs and kisses. He also asked if I could stay and be a helper. That would have been so cute - all those little Aussie babies.

I will have more reflections on all of this. Right now I just have that feeling of missing them all already. :(

Money Diary Abandoned...

So, I got a letter from the IRS that I owe $800+ for my 2007 taxes. Ick. I am not happy about that. With that, I am ending my money diaries right now.

I will find out whether I get the new position when I get back from Australia. Hopefully it'll be good news because I need some more money in my account.

Australia has been awesome. It's winter here, yet still so enjoyable. No wonder Aussies are such happy people!

Money Diary: Day 26

Early service at church. I brought a jar of mayonnaise that I got for free at Wegman's for the food drive.

After church, it was time to make the BBQ turkey meatloaf that I have been wanting to try. It's a recipe from the Neely's, who have a few BBQ restaurants in TN.

I had to go to the store and pick up some more turkey as well as a few other things - $12.08.

After preparing the meatloaf, I went to the pool.

A friend came over and there was more Settler's played. I won every game, which got kind of old after awhile. I still had fun though, and it was exactly the kind of low-key weekend I needed.

Money spent: $12.08

Money Diary: Day 25

Went to help friends paint the interior of their condo. They got us all pizza. It was a giant pizza, so I was stuffed after one slice.

The rest of the evening included sitting on the couch watching television. It was a long week and it was time to just do nothing.

Money spent: $0

Money Diary: Day 24

Typical Friday...
After work, I stopped by P's house. Originally there were plans to go to Jazz in the Garden, but the rain clouds were a deterrent. Instead, J and I had dinner with R and R at an Indian restaurant. I used one of my restaurant.com gift certificates. Our meal was about $55, but we only ended up paying about $40 including the tip. I paid $19.10.

There was a long game on Settlers after dinner, in which I was triumphant. :)

Money spent: $19.10

Money Diary: Day 23

Breakfast at home, work, brought my lunch.
After work, I had to go get some things from Michael's for a lunch speaker series that I'm coordinating at work - $14.12. I also picked up a little travel journal for myself - $2.21.

J picked me up from work and we went to dinner at Sequoia. Blech. J paid. I will never eat there again. After dinner we went on a short boat ride on the Potomac River. It was a humid evening, so the breeze on the water was nice.

Money spent: $16.33

Money Diary: Day 22

I took the day off work. I picked up some Starbucks in the morning so as to indulge in the day off - $7.51. J had a surprise day planned for me, so I thought I could at least pick him up a beverage as well. After breakfast, we were off to the metro station. We ended up at the National Zoo (free admission!) and did a scavenger hunt printed off the zoo website. After the zoo, we went to Cubano's in Silver Spring. It is one of my favorites. I was wiped out all day, napping on the metro and such. It was probably close to 100 degrees that day, so I was glad to go home after being out in the heat. We ended up getting slurpees on the way home. I can't recall being as thirsty as I was at that moment - $2.54.

I was relatively full from lunch still, so dinner was skipped as I got ready for more a surprise to come. Tickets to "The Color Purple." The show was amazing. Fantasia was incredible. I think the role was made for her or vice versa. During the show, I started to get hungry. I decided we should go to Ben's Chili Bowl. Unfortunately, there was no parking to be found, so we go the food to go. J was not going to allow chili and cheese to be eaten in his car, so I had to wait the entire ride home in torture, with the smells taunting me, before indulging.

Money spent: $10.05

Money Diary: Day 21

I had cereal at home for breakfast.
7:40 am: I got to work and had an awkward conversation with a higher-up at the office who will be assisting with interviews for the position that I applied for. She basically told me that she has heard about two great candidates for the position and that she'll find me a great supervisor. Um... does that mean that I don't have a chance anymore?

My supervisor's departure sparked hope that I could start doing something more challenging here and now there is the potential for discontent in my job. I most certainly do not like feeling that way. I really should be making more money.

12:00 pm: I have a salad for lunch - spinach and strawberries. I get a call from D asking if I want to go to Olive Garden with her and C. I decline because this is after I have totaled up how much money I spent over the weekend.

2:00 pm: I go find C and we go to McDonald's for a free 8 oz. iced mocha. It was a nice break. We have free coffee at work, but there is nothing like some whipped cream and chocalate syrup to make the day pass more quickly.

4:00 pm: I head home from work and make plans with E to go for a walk around Burke Lake after dinner. When I got home, I did a little scrapbooking and caught up with K on the phone.

6:00 pm: E made spaghetti squash for dinner.

7:00 pm: We got to Burke Lake and walked around the lake which took about an hour and 45 minutes. We had some pretty deep conversation, which I think was long overdue. I know we live together, but it's rare that we're home at the same time and of course, being in front of the boob tube isn't the best setting for any in-depth discussion.

Money spent: $0

blank stares and confusion

Lately, I feel like I don't know how to react to anything because I am uncertain about my feelings. Different people in my life have different expectations of me and I find it difficult to make the necessary adjustments. I've been in situations where someone has been really excited about something in my life and I feel like I give it a completely blase reaction. I am not sure why that is because I see myself to be an animated, often excitable person.

Maybe it's the audience that determines my response. Perhaps I'm just all sorts of confused because ultimately you are supposed to present a certain self in any given situation yet I am unable to do so. I find it difficult because I think in all situations, I want to be the most authentic me that I can be. This is not always an option though because you need to maintain a calm, cool, collected demeanor - which I guess isn't exactly how I operate... I guess I'm just an awkward weirdo...

Money Diary: Day 18, 19, 20

Friday: Had dinner at Moe's Southwest Grill, $13.17 after a $5 off coupon. After dinner, went to karaoke. Spent $20 there.

Saturday: Went to Eastern Market. Got a free slurpee from 7-11 for 7/11. Finally went to use my Groupon for $80 worth of services at Skin Beauty Lounge. Bought the Groupon for $40 (a couple weeks ago) and tipped the girl $20. She got wax in my hair and kind of messed up my eyebrows a little bit, but she was nice.
After that, I was starving and got some Popeye's for lunch - $7.14.
Had to put some money on my metro card - $10.
Ordered pizza for dinner - $14.69. I picked it up so I didn't have to tip :) and it was $2 off as well.
Stopped by at my friend's b-day party and then got a free slurpee afterwards.

Sunday: Worked out in the morning - a little yoga and all star workout courtesy of Fit Tv.
I attempted to run some errands, but was too tired and hot driving around in the car (no a/c can do that to you...). I saw gas for $2.33 so I decided that I shouldn't pass that up - spent about $14.50 filling up.
Time for groceries... I guess the last grocery store trip didn't really stock me with enough food for too long. I was starving once I got to Wegman's so I had to get something to tide me over or else I would just be really cranky. Got food from the hot food bar - $4.95.
Groceries - $59.45.

Money spent: $163.90

Money Diary: Day 17

7:30 am: I had a nectarine for breakfast and brought my leftovers from last to work for lunch.

12:00 pm: The crab burger was better the second time around. I usually taste the flavor of food more the day after. I hardly ever reheat leftovers. It's just not the same.

1:30 pm: I went to the bank to cash my rebate check. For some reason, it wouldn't let me deposit it in the ATM, which I guess is fine because I never have cash on me.

4:30 pm: I went to the post office on the way home from work to send a package, $11.95 - paid cash! :)

I guess my lunch was pretty filling because I didn't really have much of a dinner. I made some raspberry lemonade and heated up some crab legs. I caught up on yesterday's "SYTYCD" and then watched the results show. I was disappointed to see that my favorite girl dancer (besides Melissa), got kicked off. :(

During this time, I was also playing a lovely game of Settlers. The game goes a lot faster with two people and was still rather enjoyable, if only because of the smack-talking.

Money spent: $11.95

That's what Friends are for...

From the examples that I have around me, it appears that girls are more likely to join their boyfriend's social circle than the other way around. I was talking with P about how my friends are kind of lackluster with hanging out lately. I think it's because they aren't necessarily friends with one another, so there isn't that motivation for the whole group to get together. The last time I had a "circle of friends" was when I lived in Boston. I'm only friends with two of those girls now. It's kind of disgusting how cattiness and backstabbing arises in those friendships and also sad how those friends you felt so close to can fall to the wayside.

I have a hodge podge collection of close friends - from middle school, college, and Boston and San Diego. My friends have their own friends and social networks, so I mostly find myself hanging with them in one on one situations. This is quite unfortunate because sometimes you need a group to do certain things like, play Settlers, or go to karaoke.

I miss having a circle of friends, despite the issues that came up in the past. But there is something unsettling about just being swept up in someone else's social circle, so I'm resisting it at the moment. I'm not the type to force my way into any group. Maybe I feel that it is intrusive or desperate.

This is what P had to say:

"it's funny.. i think it's harder for guys to make friends, so they stick together
and girlfriends become friends, usually it's the guys who are the core"

When P was dating her last boyfriend, his friend circle was in Texas, so there wasn't really any immersion. Her current boyfriend is a friend of one of her friends, so they kind of have an insta-group there. Recently, D was sucked in to some sort of male friend circle, and other guys within that group were trying to get her to set them up. I guess it makes sense, building those types of bridges, but it could get hairy too.

Ideally, it would be nice to strike a balance with friend groups in a relationship, but with certain personalities, attitudes etc. it just ain't going to happen. I think guys tend to hang out with other guys that are superficially similar to them, whereas girls maybe have friends that they relate to on a more emotional level, but on the surface they don't have a lot in common. I don't know. I probably don't have enough evidence to back this up.

J actually has a lot more friends than I do. His friends are also a whole lot more reliable to make the effort to hang out as well. My friends either have jam-packed schedules or they are just flakey. I think nowadays I'm just coercing whoever is available to get falafel with me or go to the pool. I think I'm much more driven by new activities or food, rather than people. Eh... I do amuse myself... maybe I can amuse you too.

Money Diary: Day 16

8:30 am: I resisted the urge to purchase today's Groupon. F introduced me to Groupon's and last month I purchased one, but have yet to use it.
12:00 pm: I brought leftover macaroni and cheese, an ear of corn, and a nectarine for lunch. My pudding didn't make it to lunch. I ate it around 10:00 am.
7:00 pm: I put $10 on my smart trip card so that I could get to U Street to partake in a birthday dinner at Eatonville. I already checked out the menu earlier in the day and it looked to be a promising meal.
8:00 pm: Arrived at Eatonville. I got a lavender lemonade and chatted with people at the table, waiting for everyone to arrive.
9:00 pm: We finally order. They don't have the fried green tomato po boy that I wanted, so I get the crab burger instead. It was a mistake. I tasted the mushroom loaf and it was DELICOUS. I don't even like mushrooms!
10:15 pm: I headed outta there because I had a long way home. D was there so I had her cover my part of the bill. I'll pay her back. It'll probably be about $25.

Money spent: $10 + $25 for dinner...

Money Diary: Day 15

I got $64 refund from the Spy Museum. The $75 reimbursement for my parking ticket at UMD posted in my checking account as well!

I paid off the $640 on my credit card. I hate having a balance on my credit card, so I do my best to pay it off every month. I won't count it as an expense again since I already mentioned it before.

I had a dream last night that I was packing for Australia. It was kind of stressful!
Speaking of Australia... I am booking the Great Barrier Reef tour. $444.74 per person after a 7% off coupon. ;) I owed my brother $150 for the in country plane tickets, so he'll owe me about $70 after this.

Yeah...

Money spent: $444.74

Money Diary: Day 14

The work day felt really glum to me.
I had a meeting with my director and asked her about whether she thought I was ready to become a manager. She advised me to apply and said that either way it would be a good experience for me and that it would be good to show the company that I want to grow. So, that was that. They are looking to fill the position by September. I'm not sure who else would be applying for the position, but I guess you never know!

I had cereal for breakfast at home and then a lunch of leftovers from the day before.

After work I stopped to get gas because it's currently $2.49 and I only had about a quarter of a tank left.

A $55 rebate check came in the mail for me today. It was from contact lenses I purchased a few months ago. That definitely made the day seem brighter. I also received the boxes that I ordered from USPS for packages to MM. That means that I have an upcoming trip to the post office. :)

Money spent: $23.17

Money Diary: Day 13

I dreaded writing this entry. In fact, I almost decided to end my Money Diaries because I didn't want to face the reality of the amount of money I've spent lately.

*sigh*

Alright, so here it goes. My mom came over and we prepared a late lunch. Afterwards, I decided that I wanted to go to Leesburg Outlets because I got a mystery coupon in my email from Banana Republic for either $5, $10, $15, $20 or $500. Well, we only went into two stores, but I spent almost $200. I got some good deals. My mystery coupon was worth $10. Eh... I guess I can justify that I don't go shopping very often. Eh...

I guess I feel better now that I've disclosed this information. I will have to cut back this week.

On a better note, I have reached my Smarty Pig savings goal for my Australia trip - $1200. Hopefully, I won't use all of it... the exchange rate favors USD so at least that is on my side. That money is going towards food, zoo admission, and a tour at the Great Barrier Reef. Hmm... should I have saved more?

Money spent: $185.77

Money Diary: Day 12

Happy Fourth of July!

I woke up this morning ready to bake cupcakes. I was working on my third batch when I got a text message that K wasn't going to come over. I decided that it would just make more sense of us to go over to J's friend's house instead. We weren't planning on having many people over, so it just seemed silly to bother once she backed out. I then made plans for my mom to come over on Sunday instead. I felt really guilty about it because I know she could have made other plans.

At J's friend's house we played some wiffle ball and hung out. We didn't leave there until 1 in the morning, which makes two late nights in a row. I think I hate sleeping in. It makes me feel really anxious like I'm wasting the day away, especially since I am a morning person.

Oh well... at least I didn't spend any money today.

Money spent: $0

Money Diary: Day 11

I slept in a bit this morning since I had the day off. Yay!

I went to Wegman's to get some things for the Fourth of July. I spent $71.55, hopefully the food will last awhile. I wanted to try some cupcake recipes from a book F gave me. I guess I will have the ingredients to bake cupcakes for awhile.

After Wegman's I needed to go to DC to get souvenirs for my cousins in Australia. I picked up two books about DC, two packs of freeze dried ice cream (mint chocolate chip) and a journal made of panda poop. I spent a total of about $42 on the souvenirs.

After shopping, we met up with J's friends for a birthday dinner. We took the bus over to H St NE ($1.35). We had sushi at Sticky Rice. The total bill was about $170, but we only paid $36 since we didn't have any drinks (J paid). I really don't like the idea of paying for drinks. I think the most I ever have is just a margarita or something with dinner.

After dinner we went to a couple of other bars. At one of the bars they had skeeball so we played two rounds of it ($2). I lost by a hair both times. At the end of the evening, we caught the bus back to Chinatown and then took the metro home ($1.35+$2.35).

It was a long day, but I think it was productive and I'm ready to enjoy Saturday.

Money spent: $118.60

Money Diary: Day 10

I ate some cereal at home and had the container of fruit from yesterday as a snack throughout the morning. For some reason, I was famished. I even ate my lunch early and I'm sure I could've eaten more after that as well. People from my team at work all left work pretty early, so I followed suit. Today was payday since we have tomorrow off. I paid my rent - $650.

I came home and vegetated and then proceeded to do some yoga (dvr-ed from the FIT channel). I broke a little sweat so I felt pretty good about myself.

There was a recipe I wanted to try and tonight was the night. I made Mini Chile Relleno Casseroles. They could have been a little less soggy. I think next time I will put a potato crust at the bottom to help soak up some of the moisture from the chiles and the corn. I made 4 of them, so had some left for the next day.

J came home around 9 in the evening and we watched a movie on tv and then "So You Think You Can Dance."

Money spent: $650

Money Diary: Day 9

I had breakfast at home and brought a lean cuisine and fruit (pineapples and strawberries) to work. I'm glad there's only one day of work left for the week because I don't really have any food to bring for lunch. The fridge is looking quite bare.

I went to check out the cheaper apartment during my lunch hour. Though it was cheaper, it was less desirable, so I'm happy with the decision that was already made.

Before I went to check out the apartment, a whole huge stack of paychecks landed on my desk to be distributed. I sent out an email once I returned from my apartment hunt and people came and picked up their checks (one manager is going to mail them for me :) and I delivered a set to someone else. Now all the paychecks are gone and I find myself with little to do for the moment. :) Only an hour and a half left of work, then one more day until the weekend!

Money spent: $0

Money Diary: Day 8

7:00 am: On the way to work, I decided to stop at CVS and get some round candies to fit our pot luck theme (round). I thought lifesavers would be a good pick and a colorful addition to the table. I want to make sure to put my best foot forward with anything that my boss asks of me, especially right now... $2.35, and I'll get reimbursed.

1:45 pm: I was so stuffed from the pot luck that I wasn't very productive for the rest of the day. I could hardly keep my eyes open.

6:00 pm: After work, I went to pick up E from the airport. She was away for almost two weeks visiting friends and family in Chicago and Portland. I've never been to either city. It'd be cool to go visit sometime.

I spent the rest of the evening watching random tv. I skipped dinner, so I just snacked a little.

I'm still working on figuring out which apartment I'd like to live in. I have until tomorrow to get a $450 administrative fee back from the place that I already filed a lease with. I'm weighing the pros and cons of the two places - location, rent price, space, parking. I am going to look at a place this afternoon that will be about $70 cheaper and more space, but there could be potentially issues with traffic around those parts. We'll see...

Money spent: $2.35

Money Diary: Day 7

I ate breakfast at home this morning.

8:00 am: My supervisor told me that she's leaving for another job today. I'm sad to see her go, but I'm also excited that I might have a chance to get promoted. I'm not sure what the likelihood of that is. I don't want to get my hopes up.

2:00 pm: I went over to the apartment complex that I was interested and signed a lease, $600 for application and administration fees. Rent is $1270/mo. and it's 800 square feet and only a little over a mile from work. I did some more research on other places and found two additional places that I'd like to check out, if it's not too late.

4:30 pm: Finally made it back to Party City and bought a tablecloth, plates, cups, napkins, and table decorations. I got a $10 off coupon from my co-worker. I only spent $30, which will be reimbursed...

7:00 pm: I got home and prepared the quiche for tomorrow's pot luck. At least no more money was spent. I still have to pay my ticket and get my Cairns tour. I need to make more money...

Money spent: $630... ick, but I'll have a place to live at the end of July.

Money Diary: Day 6

I finally got a run in after not working out for... not sure how long.

My mom came over and we went to get lunch. Her treat. After lunch we went to Wegman's and then Cupcakes Actually. I bought us each a cupcake, $6.88. I think I'm getting over my cupcake craze. It's just not as inviting anymore. I got to try Death by Chocolate and Champagne Taste today. I think the Death by Chocolate was better. The other one was kind of dry.

I've yet to go to Party City... :(

Money spent: $6.88

Money Diary: Day 5

I got up at 7 am this morning and shoved a graham cracker in my face before heading out to Valvoline for a oil change and then a state safety inspection. I printed a Valvoline coupon at work yesterday for $6 off! Woohoo!

The oil change cost $50.81 after the coupon. The inspection cost $45 including the $25 he charged me for cleaning/polishing my headlights because the plastic was dull and scratched up, therefore causing my lights to be very dim. He couldn't have passed me otherwise. He advised that I would probably need new headlights before my next inspection. I started a fund on SmartyPig to meet this goal. I had noticed that my headlights sucked, but it wasn't really a big deal to me since I rarely drive at night. Perhaps my car was conditioning me not to do so!

After I got back from taking care of car shenanigans, I went to the Post Office to pick up package materials for a package that I've been meaning to send. Unfortunately, flat-rate boxes are not cheap (about $5 a pop!). I decided to call for free shipping materials instead.

When I got home, I made myself some eggs and ordered flowers to be sent to J's family, $50.85. I then called around to various Party Citys to see if they had what I was looking for, but it turns out none of them did. At least I saved myself some time and gas. I will go to Party City tomorrow and just pick up an alternative to what I originally wanted.

I still had a whole afternoon to fritter away... I needed a change of scenery, but didn't want to go too far. I ended up in Fairfax at Old Navy and then Barnes and Noble. I didn't buy anything at Old Navy and I spent many hours sitting in Barnes and Noble perusing health and fashion magazines as well as Australia travel guides. I took some notes on the interesting tidbits, but did not find any books that were worth buying. Usually I only purchase books on Amazon, but I had a gift card. Ahh... for the love of gift cards! Thank you, friends! I purchased The Time Traveler's Wife. I've read almost two chapters and it seems to be a promising read. I haven't had many books that have held my interest lately, so haven't been reading as much. I kind of want to save books to read during my Australia flights. We'll see how it all pans out.

Speaking of Australia, I'm waiting for a credit charge to be refunded for a tour that I booked in Cairns. For some reason, they aren't offering the tour that day, or maybe the tour filled up. Not sure. Either way, I need to book another tour for that day because I can't go to Australia and not see the Great Barrier Reef.

After Barnes and Noble, I went to Panera to enjoy the beautiful day and have a nice late lunch/early dinner outside. My meal was $7.65. It was a lovely afternoon and I'm quite tired. Now to take a nap before seeing what the night has to bring...

Money spent: $154.31

Money Diary: Day 4

I got in contact with the Spy Museum to get a refund for "The Spy in the City." The refund hasn't been posted to my account yet, and I just realized that I gave him the wrong credit card information. Argh... hopefully it won't be too much of an issue. I'll get to the bottom of it.

After work, I attempted to go to Party City to pick up some things for our potluck on Tuesday. They didn't have what I wanted so I will try to look at another location.

I had a yogurt and banana for breakfast and leftover Chicken and Potato Korma for lunch and dinner.

I decided to spend the evening in watching tv and attempting to scrapbook. I was on a roll with scrapbooking last weekend, but now the creative juices aren't funneling in that direction.

Money spent: $0 (with a $64 credit coming soon... I hope!)

looking for the silver lining

I felt all kinds of emotionally mixed-up and depressed yesterday. Something just wasn't right inside and I couldn't shake myself out of it. Work was fine, but I felt like the ticket just put me in a very negative, inert disposition. I couldn't understand why I was feeling so down over just a ticket, and also the potential money-drain of a new place to live. It just wasn't right.

I think that sometimes we have an intuition that makes us feel a certain way for no particular reason until some sort of revelation comes.

While at Baskin Robbins, I received a phone call from J's mom. She asked to speak to him and said it was important. As soon as the word "important" came out of her mouth, I already knew what it was that she had to tell him. J's grandfather had passed away. Last month he suffered a stroke and he was in the hospital for awhile.

I guess this news justifies how I was feeling all afternoon yesterday. It's a hard emotion to shake off. The last time I had to support someone through a death was when my step-dad died. I'm still not 100% sure what the right things to do or say are. I remember when my grandmother died, I just wanted to be alone. I wandered the streets of Boston on a gorgeous spring day by myself, trying to see the happiness of the world through tear-brimmed eyes and a broken heart.

J is driving home to his parents today and I pray that the solitude will give him peace and comfort.

Money Diary: Day 3

7:23 a.m. I paid my parking ticket online this morning. I figured I'd get this out of the way. $75...
I need to be out of E's by the end of July, so I've been trying to find a temporary sublet. I've only been paying $650 for rent at E's and utilities are rarely over $100, which has been pretty awesome. It's allowed me to have some extra funds to pay off my student loan and also for savings. Unfortunately, I don't think it will be possible to find a comparable situation.

4:20 p.m. I get pulled over when I'm less than a mile away from home. I've been putting off renewing my safety inspection sticker. Ugh, so now I get to kiss another $92 goodbye, but not quite yet.

4:30 p.m. Once the officer gives me my ticket and let's me go, I decide I'm not ready to go home just yet, so I get some gas instead. $25.

6:15 p.m. I went to go look at a potential sublet. Rent would be $1242/month. The nice thing about this deal would be that the lease only goes until the end of November, however, they would like for someone to move in on July 1st. It's not really the ideal situation considering the fact that I had planned to stay at E's for the month of July. I think unless the guy can't find anyone, I'll have to find another option.

6:30 p.m. Grocery shopping at Wegman's. I'm feeling very dejected about my future living situation and my appetite is non-existent, which I guess is a good thing so I don't pick up everything I see in the grocery store. I only spend $30 on groceries.

8:30 p.m. I want to make myself feel better and think that maybe Baskin Robbins will do the trick. I get a waffle cone with a scoop of mint chocolate chip and world class chocolate for $6. I come nowhere near finishing it. I'm just too depressed and the day doesn't get any better.

Total spent: $136 with an impending expense of $92 as well as an oil change AND safety inspection on the plate for tomorrow.

Money Diary: Day 2

7:00 a.m. I had a yogurt and a banana for breakfast.

12:30 p.m. I had my leftovers from Sweetwater for lunch. Mmm... still good!
I received some info about Spy in the City. I am putting that on my weekend itinerary. I invited some friends to come along.

3:30 p.m. I bought the tickets to the Spy in the City, each ticket is $16. I bought 4 tickets - $64. I'll get reimbursed for them.
Tomorrow I have to pay a parking ticket - $75. Ouch... no fun. I will get reimbursed by work for it though. Thank goodness.

Money spent: $64

Money Diary: Day 1

So, I read this blog called "I will teach you to be rich." My favorite feature on it is "Money Diaries," a column where people keep a written account of their financial situation and their daily spending for a week.

I've decided to keep my own Money Diary... I hope to keep it up for at least this week and maybe longer. We'll see how it goes!

Day 1:
7:00 a.m. I bring a stash of breakfast food to keep at the office so that I can eat breakfast at work. Currently, I had a box of cereal and some milk. Yesterday, I had just enough milk left for one or two more servings of cereal. Unfortunately, today when I went to the fridge, I discovered that my milk was gone! Someone either drank my milk or disposed of it. Either way, it led me to my first purchase of the week. A small carton of fat free milk from the cafe next door for $1.04.

1:00 p.m. I had a lean cuisine for lunch. I bring my lunch to work more often than not.

3:00 p.m. I remembered that I was interested in doing a Twilight 5k race at the end of July. Registration is $30 until July 10th. I am going to hold off on it because I may or may not be moving the weekend of the race. F is going to do it with me though, so I will sign up soon!

6:00 p.m. I had dinner with J, K, and K's friend at Sweetwater Tavern. I had my favorite meal... their Short Smoked Grilled Salmon Salad. Mmm... Also, there was a coupon for two free desserts - I got key lime pie and apple pie a la mode. Nothing to write home about, but a good meal. J paid.

Money spent: $1.04

Dissolved

I watched what I feel to be the last episode of "Jon and Kate + 8" last night.

The entire episode led to a devastating announcement about their divorce. In the same episode, the children were having "Crooked Houses" built. They are houses that are made to look as if kids put them together because they are crooked. Each of the twins got their own crooked house and the boys got their own house and the little girls got their own house. I think it's ironic that these houses were crooked and that there were four separate ones - I think it parallels the brokenness in the family. I know it sounds like I'm unnecessarily reading a lot into it, but the reality of Jon and Kate's divorce is so sad to me. Kate said in the episode that it isn't ideal and maybe it is the crushed ideal that hurts so much - the fact that those eight kids will be able to see the demise of their parent's marriage on tv over and over again.

The announcement that was displayed on the screen did not have the word divorce in it. It said, "legal proceedings were initiated in Pennsylvania to dissolve the 10-year marriage of Jon and Kate Gosselin." Dissolve.

where do broken hearts go?

I found out about a broken engagement yesterday. The couple was one that I knew from the office, and I just so happened to be working the girl's program when it happened. She told us at the final team meeting.

I couldn't believe it. She was two months out from the wedding. It was already all planned and deposits were put down. It made me so sad because she really is such a wonderful girl. I didn't say or do anything to console her yesterday, but this morning we both got to work at the same time. As the elevator doors closed, I looked over at her and tried to make some small talk. She apologized because the tears were already welling up in her eyes. I was able to give her a hug finally and tell her that she's ok. She is ok. She is so strong and I admire her for making it through the weekend.

My heart goes out to her and even though she most likely won't read this blog, I hope that the heart of those reading it will also go out to her.

Go State!

I spent the past few days at one of the company's programs in New York. It was only about 3 and a half days, yet somehow it was enough to make me feel as though I really gave something to those kids. I love working with youth, but I think I had my fill in Boston and San Diego - and especially the ballet academy. Brief stints like the one I just had are enough to fill the void and to feel the joy that comes from leaving that small imprint on their lives and not be desperate to get away from them.

The 24 kids in my group were truly exceptional. I think there are probably a few in every bunch that already had values that I would have found commendable, but each individual in my group of kids made a genuine effort to make the most of their experience, or at the very least, not take away from the experience for anyone else (Henry Booger). I was in awe about some of the insight that they shared or simply how they interacted with others. I found something special in each of them.

I feel like I continue to think about those kids long after they have stopped thinking about me. I always wonder what the future holds for them and for the young leaders I met this past weekend, I will wonder what kind of incredible things they will do in their lives.

I'm almost afraid to work another conference for this program because the kids I had really set my expectations so high. If the next group wasn't like this one, I would be so disappointed. *sigh*

I guess you never know... and maybe sometime soon, it'll be a chance that I'll be willing to take. I'm just glad that my job gives me the opportunity to do that. :)

agreeing to disagree

I don't think it's possible that two people can agree with one another 100% of the time. Relationships, though I would say are built on similarities, are nurtured by the friction of differences. They grow from the challenge of compromising or accepting opposing ideals. Growth comes from opening your mind, heart and life to things that we may not understand or even want to understand. Even when we can't grasp someone else's decisions or actions, if we really value them, we can see the beauty or the authenticity in how they live their life. It is when one person decides to not compromise, not accept, and not understand that a relationship begins to die.

I've witnessed many scenarios of people poo-pooing on others without attempting to understand the other person's lot. I remember when I lived with A and F. F had a real job and made probably close to four times what A and I were making and could clearly spend more freely than A and me. A would comment about F's spending habits and fail to consider how generous F was with us. F is one of the most generous people I know, always giving and generally not asking for much in return. F and A never were very close, nor ever became close even though the three of us shared an apartment for an entire year.

I'm not friends with A anymore and I'm sure that both of us contributed to the death of our relationship. I can remember one evening when I didn't feel like going out to carouse with her and she made a huge fuss over it. When I started dating someone, it caused a rift as well. She wasn't accepting nor understanding of our differences and I think it was partially lack of relationship experience on her part. Because she hadn't had many (any?) romantic relationships, she felt like I was abandoning her when I spent time with my boyfriend at the time.

I know I've caused some relationships to die, some are probably dying as I write this. I think sometimes the tradedy of it all boils down to seeing someone change for the worse, seeing someone discard their values, perhaps seeing someone lose a sense of who they are or who you thought they were. Or maybe they are just coming into their own, becoming the person who they are destined to be, becoming a person whose values are out of sync with your own, ultimately, someone who you can no longer respect.

don't talk to strangers

Today I did something stupid. Coming out of the mall to a dark parking lot, I stopped when a man approached me. He asked me if I was Vietnamese and I told him that I wasn't, then he proceeded to ask me whether I could give him a ride. I should have walked away, instead I started asking him questions like how he got there, where he was going, etc. Yeah, stupid.

Anyway, this entire time, J is on the phone and though I don't have the phone to my ear, I know what he's saying. I know what any person I could have been on the phone with would say. I know what I would say! Yet my naivete and trusting nature was speaking louder and I found myself hanging up on J and letting this man into my car. There are countless scenarios of how things could have ended up. I'll spare you the suspense. I dropped the man off within walking distance to a bus stop going where he needed to go. The End.

The whole situation left me so torn though. Strangers have done nice things for me before, just a few months ago a man stopped and helped me change my flat tire on the side of 495. So, shouldn't I try to help people as well? I guess being a woman forces you to be much more wary of danger. I certainly wouldn't want any of my female friends or family to give a ride to a stranger. Anything could happen. People prey on the kindness of strangers.

I don't know why I let the man in my car. A part of me felt like I was the only person who was willing to help him. Yeah, stupid.

birthday blah...

I love my birthday. I don't understand why everyone doesn't love celebrating their birthday as much as I do. It's a day (week or month, even!!!) to celebrate yourself! My birthday has always been a big to-do for me. I had my first birthday in Singapore and can remember years that I had parties at Chuck E. Cheese, always eating one of my favorite meals, and fancy cakes for as long as I can remember.

For my ninth birthday, I decided it wasn't fair that I couldn't have a pool party, so I had people come over to my house in their bathing suits - yes, in FEBRUARY! I was a crazy, crazy kid and I guess my mom decided not to fight the battle against that bright idea. I received two or three New Kids on the Block dolls that year.

The year after that, I got my first hamster! It was probably one of the most exciting surprises to come home and find a hamster cage sitting in the living room. I was however, less than enthused with the rip-off "Margie" doll I received from an aunt later that evening.

Anyway, as I've gotten older, birthdays have become a time to gather with my closest friends. And though they don't all like each other (no exclusive SATC crew here), it's a time when none of that matters and they just want to eat, drink and be merry with me. I'd like to think they enjoy the antics of drunk HT.

On my birthday this year, I went to lunch with co-workers and then had dinner with J, who flew in for the weekend. It was all in all a good day and I had high expectations for the weekend, mainly for Friday, a day that I had planned almost hour by hour.

The activities that I had planned for the day were scrapped because the recruiting event that I was at ran a little longer than anticipated, my feet hurt, and it was a bit blusterier than anticipated (I got to do them on Sunday, though!). I still held high hopes for dinner. I wanted to try a new restaurant in DC. When dinner plans kind of fell through, J decided to get in contact with his friends and make new dinner plans since he doesn't see his friends in DC that often. With dinner plans scrapped, somehow, there was a miscommunication and post-dinner plans were taken off the plate too. I don't want to go into detail about what was done instead because that might worthy of another blog, but I'll just say, it wasn't fun.

Well, my official "birthday party" is this Saturday so I just hope that this event will be better than what ensued last Friday. Plans include Roy Roger's fried chicken and karaoke. A few of my closest friends can't make it, so I'm a little disappointed, but it's not the end of the world. We just won't be friends anymore. Hahaha... just kidding!

So yeah, birthdays = big deal. Don't forget it!

Getting Old...

Some of you may know that I had a birthday recently, but the passing of my youth actually became aware to me through an incident the day before my birthday. It was a lovely, sunshiney Wednesday, so I decided to take advantage of the warm weather and go rollerblading. I haven't rollerbladed in a long time, over a year even. Though, I was a bit unsteady at first, I thought nothing of it since I had just recently been ice-skating without injury. I rollerbladed down the street and steadily picked up speed. And more speed. More speed than I could handle. Who knew there was such a decline on this street? Certainly not the girl who's only been living here for a week and a half! Without properly thinking out a course of action, I did a weird turn and threw myself onto the ground. The momentum got the best of me and I scraped off a good chunk of my knee. And on top of that, I got a hole in my favorite workout pants and a lovely scrape on my elbow as well.

My wounds are still healing and every time I bend my knee or elbow, they open up just a little. I don't know when I'll build up the courage to go rollerblading again - I guess when I find somewhere REALLY, REALLY flat or until I find my elbow and knee pads. *tear* "Safety, first." That'll be my old woman mantra.

Final Fete

We are having the last get together in the apartment today in celebration of Chinese New Year.

I have neglected to mention that Mr. Fish has passed. I found him floating in his bowl on the day that our new President was sworn into office. I think he knew that his time in 8107 was going to end and couldn't dream of living elsewhere. He lived a good two+ years. He was a resilient fish. He will be missed.

purge

I've been having lots of random thoughts and feelings lately. I seem to be floating in a gray cloud. The Inauguration has come and gone. It wasn't the moment that I expected it to be because I was "posting" at a museum. I should have bucked the rules a little just once (ok, maybe I've already done that here and there) and made my way to the Capitol where the man that has restored hope and pride in our Nation took his oath. I poured over the online videos of it, so I will just try to form it in my memory as being there. The rest of the day... I will try my hardest to forget.

The time for me to move is drawing closer and closer. I have about a week left in this apartment and it's making me sad. There are things I won't miss like driving around desperately looking for a parking space. Other things aren't coming to mind at the moment, except for the CVS. I HATE my CVS. Good riddance. I will miss my Giant though and I'll miss being able to walk to a bunch of different places like Asian Bistro, Cubano's, AFI, Borders, DSW, etc. I don't know why the distance between here and Centreville seems so great. I know it really isn't, but I feel like it will be a different world. At least I'll be able to go to Wal-Mart and always have a parking space. And I'm looking forward to living with E - something we had talked about since high school!!!

I went to hip hop class with my brother for the second time today. It was a lot of fun and I really do like spending time with him. He's a really good-natured person. He will watch me dance and try to give me pointers and he's just so nice to everyone and at ease with himself - these are things that I should definitely learn from him. He doesn't know it yet, but after I move, I will still go to Thursday hip hop class with him and then just spend the night at his place. There is something that is so simple and normal about spending time with your siblings. I wonder how long we could hang out before we started fighting like we did as kids.

Inauguration 2009

Today is the eve of the Presidential Inauguration. It's a crazy time in DC and there are about a million and one events going on. I feel like I'm much too tired or stressed out to actually enjoy any of it and I'm also sad that I can't participate in all the activities. Yesterday, I was fortunate enough to hear General Colin Powell and Archbishop Desmond Tutu speak (work perk). There are other speaking events that I have missed and volunteer opportunities that I can't help with. I just want this time to stay with me. It is a time of celebration and I don't want it to pass me by without savoring the emotion of it. I feel so bogged down with the logistics of it all - buying snacks for the big day, where to use the bathroom, how to get there, how to get back... I just want to get in the right frame of mine to enjoy it all. Less than 24 hours to go!!!